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  “You wanna touch yourself, don’t you?” His breath hitched when he thought about what came next. He didn’t know if he could stand still while she pleasured herself, but he would try. It was important for her to get comfortable with her own body before she considered giving it to him. “You wanna stroke your clit?”

  She moaned and licked her lips, her eyes drifting to the bulge in the front of his pants. “I’d like it even more if you’d do the honors.”

  “Not gonna happen, baby. At least not yet. First, I want you to show me what you want, how you like it.”

  Her eyes drifted closed. “That night… you made me come so fast…”

  He would never forget how responsive she was to his touch. That was part of the reason he hadn’t been able to get that night out of his head. “Open your eyes and look at me.”

  Her eyes flew open before her hand began to glide down her flat stomach.

  “Stop!” He knew his harsh tone startled her, but she needed to know that he was in charge. “I’ll tell you when and if you can touch yourself. Is that understood?”

  “Yes… sir.”

  His eyes penetrated hers as she searched for a sign of mockery he didn’t see. Just the sound of that word on her lips nearly brought him to his knees, but he refused to reveal his weakness. “I like that.” He had never been so tempted to ravage a woman in his life. He wanted to take her, possess her, make her his in every sense of the word. But he knew she would spook easily… he had to tread lightly. He questioned whether she even understood what she was getting herself into, agreeing to be his submissive. Not that she’d agreed to anything yet, but she would. Soon.

  “Show me how wet you are. Now.”

  He watched her hands glide down her stomach, over her hips, to her mound. The clipped triangle hid her arousal from him, and he practically trembled by the time she slid a finger between her soft lips, peeling herself apart for his perusal.

  “Jesus,” he whispered. The sight of her pink and swollen, glistening with the evidence of her excitement, made it difficult for him to think straight. “You’re so hot, so sexy.”

  “Please…”

  He knew she was close to climaxing, but he wanted to draw out her orgasm as long as he could stand it. “Rub your clit, but stop when I tell you to. Got it?”

  Without responding, she began rubbing the distended bud feverishly, as though she couldn’t stand to wait another second to claim the orgasm her body desperately needed.

  “Stop!”

  She whimpered, but pulled her hand away, waiting for his instructions.

  “Now I want you to slide two fingers into your pussy, nice and slow. Don’t thrust, just enjoy the sensation.”

  She widened her stance and he watched two fingers disappear.

  “Spread your legs wider and add a third finger.” His voice sounded raspy, and he was closer to the edge than he’d ever been fully clothed. His body pleaded with him to just take her already, but he wouldn’t give in until he took her to the peak of sanity and back again. “That’s it, just like that.” He watched her tilt her hips up, and he knew she was dying to plunge her fingers in and out of her tight heat.

  “Oh…”

  “Look at me,” he said quietly. “You know why I’m doing this, don’t you?”

  “I—”

  “Your pleasure is mine now. Your body, your orgasms are mine. You don’t come until I tell you to. You don’t use any toys to get off when you’re alone. You don’t come unless I’m with you, unless I give you permission. Is that understood?”

  “But… I…”

  “You want to come, don’t you?”

  “Yes.”

  “You trust me to make you feel good?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good.” Cole knew she wasn’t ready to surrender completely, but she would be by the end of the night. He would make sure of it. “Now, I want you to slide your fingers in and out while you rub your clit with your thumb. But when you feel like you’re gonna come, I want you to stop. If you come, I’ll be very, very angry.”

  “But I need to come, please.”

  “You will, soon. But I want to taste you. I want to feel you throbbing against my lips when you do.”

  She shivered and her eyes glazed over as she slid her fingers in and out of her tight opening. “Oh God…”

  “That’s enough.” He didn’t trust that she had the control to halt her orgasms at will yet, so he decided it was time for him to take over. “Take my clothes off.” He watched her walk toward him slowly, and when she reached for him, his cock jerked in response. He had always had impressive endurance with his previous lovers, but he knew this woman would test his iron will tonight and every night thereafter.

  She kissed his chest as she bared it, and he thought about chastising her for taking liberties without his permission, but she looked so beautiful with her mouth pressed to his skin that he didn’t have the heart to reprimand her. He would have plenty of time to make her understand the rules. Tonight was only the beginning for them.

  Chapter Five

  Charlene chastised herself for allowing things to go this far. She knew this shouldn’t happen again. A relationship with Cole was out of the question, but maybe, just maybe she could steal a few more hours of pleasure in his capable hands. Her conscience told her she should have ended her relationship with Paul first, but they’d never agreed to be exclusive.

  She had missed out on the opportunity to see Cole completely naked last time they had sex, and what a sight to behold. He was a big man, tall, with wide shoulders, defined abs, and lean hips. Every woman’s naughty fantasy, and he was promising to give her everything she secretly craved. She’d be crazy to refuse. Determined to push her doubts aside, she vowed to relax and enjoy the ride.

  Watching him lay the hand-made throw out on the floor, she was struck by how uninhibited he was. Not just with her, but with everyone. He was comfortable in his own skin, confident in who he was, and he didn’t feel the need to blow smoke to impress anyone. She loved that about him. No, love was too strong a word, wasn’t it? She couldn’t be falling in love with this man. Her heart pounded harder as the truth settled over her. Oh God, was it already too late?

  “Hey,” he said, reaching for her hand and pulling her toward him. “What’s wrong, baby? You looked scared all of a sudden.”

  She was terrified. How had she allowed a comfortable friendship to evolve into so much more? Every day she felt a pang in her chest when he walked out the door, holding his little girl’s hand, but she told herself it was nothing. Sure, she was attracted to him, she enjoyed his company. They had a lot in common, from sports to their love of horses, fast cars, and big trucks. They both loved kids and dogs and... Oh God, why hadn’t she seen this before? He was everything she’d ever wanted in a man, but that dark, deviant streak meant she could never have him. Loving him would mean losing everything that meant anything to her, the respect of her peers, friends, and family. Possibly even the job she worked so hard to excel at. Everywhere she went, people would talk and whisper about them, what they did behind closed doors, how a nice girl like her had allowed a man like Cole to draw her in to his dungeon of depravity. She knew she shouldn’t care what anyone thought, but she couldn’t help it; she did.

  “Cole,” she said, pressing her hands against his chest, trying to push him away while his arms circled her waist. “I think you’d better go.”

  His eyes darkened and she knew he was angry and confused. “What’re you talkin’ about?”

  “This was a bad idea. We can’t do this. It’s wrong—”

  “Who says it’s wrong? Your parents, your brother, your boss, your boyfriend? Who has the right to say it’s wrong for you to want to be with me?”

  She hated that she hurt him, but he deserved to know the truth. “Everyone, but that’s not the point. It’s me, I just can’t do this. I’m sorry.”

  He thrust a hand into her hair, holding her neck as he searched her eyes. “You have feelings f
or me.”

  Yes! “No.”

  “Why are you so afraid to admit it?”

  She fixated on his chest when she could no longer face the pain she saw in his eyes. She’d never intended to hurt him, never even suspected she had that kind of power over him. “I don’t expect you to understand. You didn’t grow up here. Small town life is so different than life in a big city, you know that.”

  “Yeah, it can be hell at times.”

  She stroked his jaw, wishing she could say or do something to ease his anguish. “You’re a good man, Cole, a wonderful father… you do so much for the community, but—”

  “Everyone just sees me as some sick bastard who gets off on hurtin’ women, right?” He turned away, facing the fire, and she couldn’t resist the urge to stroke his back, to offer him some small measure of comfort.

  “I know you’d never hurt me.”

  He thrust his hands into his hair and grimaced. “I’d never cross that line with you. I like to be in control, but your safety, your pleasure comes first. I…”

  She wanted to understand, but her limited sexual experience made that impossible. Sure, she’d read her fair share of erotic books, but they didn’t help her understand why the man she was falling in love with felt the need to dominate his partners. She wanted to understand, but she knew allowing herself to get in any deeper would be a mistake.

  Turning to face her, he whispered, “I wanna be with you. I don’t know if I can control my… urges, but I’m willin’ to try… for you.”

  Her heart skipped a beat as she reveled in the sacrifice he’d offered to make… for her. “I can’t ask you to be someone you’re not, Cole. You need a woman who understands this lifestyle, who’s not afraid to embrace it, in spite of what people might think.” She hated feeling so weak. She wanted to be strong enough to stand up to her family, friends, employer, the parents of her students, anyone and everyone who dared to question her about her feelings for this man. But she couldn’t risk everything for someone who was only looking for a good time. It would be professional suicide, and by the time their relationship had run its course and he’d tired of her, she’d have nothing left.

  He kissed her neck, trailing his lips to her shoulder. “Let me love you tonight,” he whispered. “Just you and me. No commands or expectations. Just two people who like each other, who are attracted to each other, findin’ a little mutual satisfaction. Please… don’t say no.”

  Her mind screamed no, but her heart pleaded with her to say yes. She knew if she turned him away tonight, he wouldn’t offer again. It was now or never. “I don’t know—”

  Cole framed her face with his hands and delved into her mouth, lowering her defenses with every stroke of his tongue. “Give yourself to me tonight,” he murmured, stoking her desire with quick lashes of his tongue inside her ear. “I promise you won’t regret it. We’ll go slow. So slow. Let me worship your body…” His rough hands skimmed over her hips, cupping her bottom. “Every inch of your body.” His voice was raspy when he said, “I just wanna kiss you all over. I wanna feel you takin’ me so deep inside, milkin’ me…” A shudder moved through his big body. “Baby, I just need to feel you throbbin’ around my cock. Please. God, don’t deny me this. Please.”

  She knew Cole was used to getting what he wanted. He’d probably never pleaded for anything in his life, least of all a woman. But he pleaded with her now, and she couldn’t deny him. Especially when she wanted him as much, if not more. “Yes,” she whispered, peppering kisses on his bare shoulder. “Yes.”

  Cole heaved a sigh of relief. He didn’t realize how much he wanted her, needed her, until he’d almost lost his chance. He wasn’t ready to define what he felt, but he knew it was epic. Whatever she needed to feel secure, he was willing to do it.

  He didn’t want to cause a rift with her family, and he certainly didn’t want to cause her grief at work, but he needed her; it was as simple as that. He couldn’t let her go back to a man he knew was determined to convince her to settle into a safe and comfortable life of domesticity. She was his, damn it, and he couldn’t let another man have her.

  “Lay down, sweetheart,” he said, turning her back to the blanket.

  He’d never tried to be a sweet and gentle lover before, even with his wife. They never made love, they only had sex. A sinking feeling in his stomach reminded him of his mother’s words. He was so concerned about his own needs, he hadn’t stopped to consider what Andrea might want or need. He tried to mold and shape her into the perfect submissive when all she ever wanted was to be his lover. He wouldn’t, couldn’t make that mistake again. Not with Charlene.

  He watched her lie back, reaching up for him to join her, and something in him snapped, releasing a flood of emotion he hadn’t realized he’d been trying to keep in check. All those hours he spent with her, talking about the work she did to her house, the new employees he hired at the ranch, his daughter’s dance recitals and gymnastics… He’d shared his life with her and fallen in love. His heart hammered as she stared up at him, and he wanted to tell her, to show her…

  “Cole…” she whispered, taking his hand and bringing it to her lips. “Aren’t you gonna make good on that promise?”

  He’d promised to love her body, but how could he keep his feelings out of the equation? Wouldn’t she see right through him? He never allowed himself to be vulnerable with a woman before, be the first one to profess love, or give a woman the power to bring him down. Whether she realized it or not, she was the one in control.

  He closed his eyes, trying to focus on giving her pleasure, but as his lips skimmed her soft skin, he realized she was the one giving him pleasure. With every soft moan that slipped through her lips, every time she threaded her hands through his hair and drew his head closer… she gave him everything he needed and more.

  Circling her nipple with tongue, he licked, nibbled, and teased as he held her hips firmly in his hands to keep her from rising off the blanket. Instead of insisting she lie still for his sensual invasion, he forced her to stay down, to surrender to the pleasure until she thought she couldn’t stand it another second. As he eased down her body and began kissing her intimately, he heard her whisper his name, and he knew now was the time to tell her he loved her, that he wanted her, in his bed, his home, helping him raise his daughter. But he couldn’t force the words past the fear that nearly rendered him immobile.

  He savored her sweetness, basking in her unique flavor as he circled her clit with his tongue, forcing her to give him the release he’d earned. “Not yet,” he said when she tried to push him away. “I’m not even close to bein’ done with you yet.” The force of her orgasm rocked her, but instead of allowing her to retreat, he used his mouth to coerce her into climbing the peak again, slowly and steadily, until her entire body trembled and she sobbed.

  “It’s okay, baby,” he whispered, gathering her in his arms. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.” He held her tight, never wanting to let her go as she sobbed quietly in his arms.

  “I feel so stupid.” She sniffled. “I don’t even know why I’m crying, except…”

  The look in her eye told him more than he needed to know. Please, no. “Don’t,” he said. “I don’t wanna hear it. Not now.” Not yet. He wasn’t one to live in denial. He always faced his problems head on, but this time, he wasn’t ready to do that. He wanted to hold on to the belief that he could make her fall in love with him, that her family and friends would pale in comparison to her need to be a part of his life.

  He poised himself above her, trying to ignore the tears sliding down her cheeks into her hairline. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. He wasn’t supposed to feel this way about a woman who could never love him back.

  “Let me make love to you.” His voice was gruff, hiding his fear of rejection, because he knew if she told him to leave now, he’d have no choice but to go. She never agreed to be his submissive. He had no control over her. For the first time in his life, he surrendered his power, and he had the si
nking feeling it would be the biggest mistake he ever made.

  Without a word, she guided his shaft to her entrance and tipped her legs open to welcome him. He wanted to believe that she’d had a change of heart, but the sadness he saw in her eyes told him that nothing changed. Sliding into her tight sheath reminded him of the last time they came together, but this time it was so much more. Back then, she was a hot stranger, but now she was the woman he would lay down his own life to protect.

  “Feels like comin’ home,” he muttered. By the time he realized he’d said the words aloud, he knew it was too late to take them back. He looked into her eyes and they stayed like that for endless minutes, suspended in time as he tried to remember how to breathe. “Don’t tell me this doesn’t feel right. You know this is what you’ve been waitin’ for, what we’ve both been waitin’ for.”

  “No.” She bit her lip, obviously trying to rein in her own emotions. “Don’t say that.”

  Trying to ignore her protests, his mind shut down and he willed his body take the lead. Thrusting deeper, harder, faster… he lost control. He became a man possessed by the darkness he’d tried so hard to keep leashed. He was desperate, intense, but when he heard her shout his name, reason resurfaced and he pulled out.

  As she scrambled to her feet with the blanket wrapped around her, he finally realized the pounding wasn’t coming from the pressure in his head. Someone was outside, yelling for her to open the damn door. Her brother, Jake. Shit.

  He needed to say something, to apologize for being so rough with her, for zoning out, but before he could voice his regret, she stumbled toward the door. He pulled his jeans on and tried to focus on what he needed to say to her, to try and make her understand that he wasn’t a monster. He was just a guy trying to figure out how to deal with his feelings for her.

  “You son of a bitch,” Jake McCoy said, storming in to the house as soon as his sister unlocked the door. “I knew that was your truck parked outside. You worthless piece of shit,” he said, coming at Cole hard and fast, shoving him against the wall. “I thought you were my friend.”